So...someone recently told me that they thought that when it comes to relationships, they thought that I was the type of person that liked a challenge. Not someone who just took things as they came to her, handed on a silver platter by a butler with white gloves on. Not me. Now, I'm no longer the girl that seeks the one man that doesn't want her back, but the girl that seeks the man that won't make her the center of his life. The man that has other interests than to sit and look at her all day, the man that has his own friends, his own activities. Now, I am not saying that this man will ignore her(you know...the type that will come in from out of town and won't call for 3 or 4 days) he'll include her in his things, they'll do things together...but they won't do everything together.
I've been in many types of relationships. I've been the ignored partner, I've been the center of someone's life. I'd like to try the middle road. Where is that guy?
I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone and feel like, "if I want to hang out with a friend, this person is either going to want to come, or they're going to feel like I don't want to be with them". I don't want to be made to feel guilty about wanting to spend time by myself. I also don't want to be in a relationship and spend so much time apart, that when we do see each other, we have to re-learn each other!
So, I guess that person was right. I like a challenge. I think relationships are supposed to be challenging, they're difficult. You're supposed to work at it - I think once you don't want to work at it - its over. The person that's right for me is the one that even when the relationship is facing a uphill climb, I'll still want to climb that mountain with them.
Guess I need to invest in some good climbing boots and some rope!
1 comment:
Tendacris, when you find that climbing gear let me know. I understand how you feel when you say you don't want to be the center of one's universe, nor do you want to be ignored. As we get older, we get pressured into telling people exactly how we feel, when in reality, we really don't know. I think it is perfectly okay to share with someone what you think you want, and change your mind if it's not what you want. For example, wanting someone to spend time with, but later discovering that you don't want to spend all of your time with that person is okay and does not indicate game playing. On the contrary, it is a sign of maturity that you are learning more and more about yourself. Identity is very important at our age, so it's good that you haven't allowed someone else's desires define who you want to be.
IWIKWIW
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